Published: September 26, 2008 10:39 am            

Home with heart... Couple’s prayers answered by little angels

SPANISHBURG — Amy Dunford can remember lying in bed at night, praying through tears that God would send her a baby. He sent her 6.

Amy and her husband, Jeff, were sweethearts at Spanishburg High School, where they were voted the best couple of their senior class and occasionally found themselves in the principal's office after being spotted kissing in the halls.

After high school, they married and made a home in the same rural community where they both grew up. Jeff went to work for the West Virginia Turnpike, while Amy ran a day care operation out of their home.

They were happy together and in their work, but the quiet of the house at night was hard to handle while Amy hoped for her own babies to care for. Series of doctors' visits and years of waiting yielded few answers as the young couple continued to hope for children.

“I prayed and prayed, 'God, please let me have a baby,' but I never got pregnant,” Amy said. “Now, I know why. If I had had my own, I would never have had the ones I have now.”

In 2003, the Dunfords started considering foster care and adoption. Amy knew all along she either wanted no children or a full house, but Jeff was slightly more reserved.

“I wasn't sure about it. I was hesitant at first, when we looked at fostering and adoption,” he said.

So, they prayed again, this time that God would open their hearts and their home to children who needed both.

“I just told God, 'You've got my heart. Here it is,'” she said. “I asked God not to put any kids with me that wouldn't be able to stay, and I asked him to send me the ones who were meant to be with us.”

Moved to enter the foster program, Amy and Jeff completed the required PRIDE training for foster and adoptive parents and started working through the Children's Home Society.

Their first foster placements were two babies, who were removed from the Dunfords' home on Christmas Eve, four days after their arrival. It was hard to watch the babies go, Amy said she knew God would never take them from her and Jeff if they were meant to be part of their lives.

Next, the Dunfords learned that two young boys, Jeremy and Walter, then 9 and 5 years old, needed a safe place and warm hearts in their lives. Amy and Jeff took them in, and the two became their first sons.

Five years later, Jeremy, 14, and Walter, 10, are the big brothers to four more siblings: Hollie, Richard, Greg and Christopher.

“In a year and a half, we went from zero to six kids,” Amy said. “And, we love them all.”

It took five years to make all the adoptions complete, but today, all six of the Dunford children are finally at home.

“They were our kids when they were born. We just didn't know it,” Amy said.

And, while Jeff may have been slightly concerned when the fostering began, he said the decision was the best one they'd ever made.

“Now, I wouldn't change it for anything,” he said.

•••

The home that once seemed so quiet when the Dunfords prayed for children is now bustling, busy with the chaos of life with six kids ages 3-14.

“It's crazy. We always have lots of antics,” Jeff said.

Amy's day usually starts about 4:30 a.m., when she gets up in time to shower and pull herself together before she wakes the kids.

Mornings are the most hectic, when everyone is trying to pick out clothes, get dressed, tame hair, match socks, eat breakfast and get to school.

“It seems like I've always got two crying at any one time,” Amy said.

Then, it's time for the trip to school. At 14, Jeremy is the oldest Dunford still in school at Spanishburg, and he plays football on the PikeView High School freshman team. Walter and Richard, now 10 and 5, are also enrolled at Spanishburg, while Hollie and Greg spend their days there in pre-K classes. The youngest, Christopher, just started in the Lashmeet Head Start program.

For the first time in five years, Amy is alone at home during the day, cleaning, washing and cooking.

“I have two washers, two dryers, two refrigerators and freezers and a deep freeze,” Amy said. “I do three to four loads of laundry a day, and that's if I keep up with everything.”

A trip to the grocery store always requires at least two carts, and the Dunfords estimate they spend at least $1,000 a month on groceries to feed their family.

At bath time, the floor is almost certain to get flooded; a snack-time request for blueberries turns into a lesson in sharing with five siblings, and a single session in sculpting Play-Doh yields a single, unique shade of gray clay once all the colors are smooshed into one.

While Richard blows on a water-filled whistle, Christopher sneaks a popsicle from the laundry room freezer. Worn out from a day at school, Hollie lays down on the floor in a pretty, purple dress, while Walter and Greg continue making gray masterpieces. Jeremy relaxes in the living room, close enough to keep an eye on his little brothers and sister but away from the melee.

This is life as usual at the Dunford house, where the family also includes three dogs and two cats.

“Our cup runneth over,” Amy said, and she wouldn't have it any other way.

For her, the secret to managing everything is to stay organized, while Jeff said flexibility is also essential.

“You pretty much all the time have to expect the unexpected,” he said. “Don't try to plan anything, because it's impossible.”

•••

Now six-time adoptive parents, Amy and Jeff said they would recommend adoption without question.

They were recently recognized for by the Congressional Coalition on Adoption as Angels in Adoption and got to visit Washington, D.C., for a gala where they were among the guests of honor. While there, they met U.S. Sen. Jay Rockefeller, who said he stood in awe of their capacity to love and willingness to open their hearts.

“The Dunfords just amaze me — they are such remarkable people, who are an example to us all,” Rockefeller said. “They have opened their homes and their hearts and shown nothing but love and determination within their family and community, and now, six children have a permanent and loving home. Jeff and Amy are a testament to wonderful men and women across the state and nation involved in foster care and adoption services. I am so honored to know them.”

The Dunfords humbly accepted the honor and recognition as Angels in Adoption, but they said they were the lucky ones.

“To me, these kids are just such blessings … It's kind of like if you won the lottery and somebody said, 'You're so great because you took all that money.' Nobody would say that,” she said, laughing. “To me, Jeff and I are the ones who won the lottery. We got these wonderful kids, and we love them.”

For them, adoption seems like a simple decision, but Amy said she was stunned to hear the statistics of American children who still need homes.

“They said at the gala that 40 percent of people in America think about adoption at some point, and there are 129,000 kids who are up for adoption,” Amy said. “If only 1 in 5 of that 40 percent would actually adopt one child, then every child would have a home.”

Amy and Jeff couldn't say enough favorable words about the Children's Home Society and case worker Tiffany Kirk, who they clearly believe is also an angel in adoption, whether she has the certificate or not. But, they pointed out there are many other programs designed to help any family willing to foster or adopt children. The West Virginia DHHR, Birth to 3, Right from the Start, Head Start and more are ready and available to serve children who need a home and families willing to provide one.

“There is a lot of work in it, but it's worth every minute,” Jeff said.

“You can just see the potential in their little faces,” Amy said, remembering the days when she met her children. “They just need the opportunities to reach that potential.”

Five years ago, the Dunfords couldn't have foreseen their family, as crazy, chaotic and full of love as it is today. But, they believe strongly that God had a plan while they prayed.

“Our associate pastor was over here a while back, and we were talking. I told him he could stop praying so hard. We're all full up now,” Jeff said.

For now, their family is complete. Whether that will always be the case remains to be seen. Amy said six kids was enough to satisfy even her dreams of a big family, but Jeff said they would see what the future brings.

“I know her well enough to know that we'll probably do it again,” he said.

For more information on adoption, contact the West Virginia Children's Home Society at (304) 431-2424.

— Contact Tammie Toler at ttoler@ptonline.net.

        

• Click to discuss this story with other readers on our forums.