Bluefield Daily Telegraph, Bluefield, WV

Sister Newspapers' Blogs

November 5, 2012

Pity the poor husband without do-it-yourself skills

Why does a new, young wife assume that her husband has all of the manual skills of her daddy?

And why are new husbands so anxious to avoid disappointing their brides that they willingly go into harm’s way?

My first foray into the world of the handyman started innocently enough. My sweetie asked me to hang some framed photos.

Her father was a great carpenter who built their family home. Mine was a good carpenter.

Our apartment lease said we had to fill any holes in the walls so she reminded me to be careful when I located the “stud” for the nail.

I didn’t know they were 16 inches apart so I took the only nail I could find and began to search.

Blam!

Unsure of the thickness of the wallboard, I hit the nail a bit harder than planned and missed the stud but left a hole with my nail she said was more like a railroad spike.

Not to be outdone, I tried again.

Blam! Blam! Blam!

By now the wall looked like it had been attacked with a machine gun. She finished hanging the pictures.

It was different when we replaced our family room paneling a few years later in our second home.

The new plywood paneling fit nicely where the old paneling was removed . . . until we came to the wall plugs and light switches.

I couldn’t find a measuring tape but I knew I could hold the paneling upright in front of the wall and make the holes with a jigsaw, by sight.

No one told me the paneling would wobble or that I should measure twice and cut once.

The holes I made looked more like broken windows. A kindly neighbor finished that job.

A couple of years later, she asked if I knew how to use spray foam. She was bug proofing our home. I lied and said I did.

Text Only
Sister Newspapers' Blogs
Bill Archer
AP Video
Girl Struck by Plane on Florida Beach Dies US Ready to Slap New Sanctions on Russia Rodents Rampant in Gardens Around Louvre Raw: 2 Shells Hit Fuel Tank at Gaza Power Plant Kerry: Not Worried About Israeli Criticism Raw: Massive Explosions From Airstrikes in Gaza Boater Rescued From Edge of Kentucky Dam Looming Demand Could Undercut Flight Safety House to Vote on Slimmed-down Bill for Border Giant Ketchup Bottle Water Tower Up for Sale Gaza Official: at Least 100 Killed Tuesday Raw: Earthquake Rocks Mexico's Gulf Coast Raw: NH Man Held on $1M in Teen's Kidnapping Easier Nuclear Construction Promises Fall Short Judge OKs Record-setting $2B Sale of Clipper Raw: Aftermath, Artillery Shells Hit Donetsk Kerry: Humanitarian Cease-fire Efforts Continue Jury Awards Ventura $1.8M in Defamation Case Fox Dons 'Bondage Strap' Skirt at Comic-Con Mother of 2 Makes NFL Cheerleading Squad at 40
Greg Jordan